My eye is watering, my head is slightly aching and needless to say, i didn't go to school today. Which is a good thing. I need to sleep. I don't think that i could survive one more day without adequate sleep. But its seemingly useless, because every night i get the suggested amount of shut-eye, and yet it does nothing for my body. I'm still exhausted. Still reluctant to do anything which my day dictates. All the things i need to do, i never get done.
So i was thinking about samara. The fact that her puppy has died---he was only a few months old and i still don't know what happened---brings random images to my mind, sam's father driving us to the local coffee shop for frozen cappuccinos and candies, staying up all night long just pondering why the fuck we did this, or that, laughing, rarely crying, and at any given moment, always enjoying ourselves. After all, Sam's supposed to be my best friend, as dumb as that sounds. There's an arsenal of memories telling me that it's totally worth it to keep trying to keep that a reality every time she cancels our plans, every time she doesn't call, every time she breaks a promise or previous engagement without any real reason. I'm starting to think that i'm stupid for trying. Andy calls it loyalty, but is it really loyalty if i never learn when to stop? Sad thing is, I already know that we've been through this before. Or at least I have.
Saturday we're hanging out.
I'm worn out.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment