There are so many thoughts racing through my mind right now. how i've noticed that i can nearly never agree with someone---i always have to antagonize, i always have to defend myself. i can never just sit back and shut the fuck up. i need to stop being so domineering. maybe it's just my height. or lack thereof. the elf always wants the leg up.
im also thinking about somebody. it's probably nothing. a dead end sort of thing that i shouldn't even briefly consider. i dont know. he seems pretty wonderful.
ive also noticed how short my hair has become since haircut. trivial, i know.
im terribly tired. but for some reason the last thing i want to do right now is go to sleep. i probably should. but i am devoid of desire to do so. so i won't. because i listen to my gut, nearly never my reason. i suppose its what they call 'living in the moment'. do whatever the fuck you feel you want.
it also just occurred to me i need to stop talking like a sailor. i kiss my puppy with this mouth.
but he's morally decrepit---naked 24/7 and mounts his barney blankey frequently---so i suppose it all evens out.
im in the mood to watch a romantic film and swoon. but i wouldn't be able to keep my eyes open long enough to see the (hopefully) happy ending.
someone hold my hand.
ahhhh.
i'll stop here.
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